My first song proper, recorded.

[RandomHero]

www.soundclick.com/bands/pagemusic.cfm?bandID=447424

Entitled Meet Me. Still in development, but I lack the gear to give it drums or bass yet. Feedback please.

[UnklMickey]

if you had lied, and told me that was Greg Lake before he was with King Crimson or ELP, i would have believed you.



i listened to it on a laptop, so with the crummy little speakers, i can't do a good evaluation.

i like the sound during the verses, but something needs a little help during the chorus.

for instance the first 2 measures of the intro are almost straight, but then in the 3rd measure, the rhytmic pattern becomes "lilty".

that sort of thing is okay in moderation, but when you do it during the chorus it sort of clashes with the vocal.

it's not awful or anything, but i think simpler might be more effective.

maybe a straight (rhythmically) eighth note sequence outlining the chord might work.



all in all, i think it's quite good.



unk

[RandomHero]

Wow, thanks. That's very helpful, I'll give it some thought.

[quarry]

Maybe its my crappy speakers (but in this case, I don't think so) but I hear some distortion on the vocal track...

Sounds like maybe a compressor kicking in?

I hear it, for instance, on the word "crawl" when you sing, "we can crawl through the concrete..."

The song itself is very good! Nice "construction"!!!

The vocal track seems to be well within your range - maybe you could double it in some places, and add a harmony in some...

[RandomHero]

I actually have a harmony for it that my buddy sings when we do it together. The the vocal distortion was my fault; I'm used to crappy $10 mics that you have to practically eat to get any vocal body, and this was recorded with my new e835 Sennheiser...

[lunaalta]

Very nice sound!
Nice tune too.......

You might try Leaf Drums to get yourself a drum track. Very easy to use and quite flexible.
Can't help with the bass (I use midi with Sonar 4, export it as .wav and bring it back in to play with).